Kes: "Mama, there's a bird in the sky. It's flying."
Me: "Oh, look at it. Can you fly too?"
Kes: "No."
Me: "Are you sure?"
Kes: "No! I don't got wings!"
Elly sure seems to though. Tonight she counted to 100. (To Kes, in the next room. If I asked her, it would never happen.) Yesterday we pulled up and parked next to a banking institution called "Capital Market Accounts". She said, "Mommy, are we buying our food at that market?" She's soaring. How did she get so big?
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
The Facts of Life
When it comes to anatomy and physiology, Elly is on top of her game. She understands bone v. muscle, blood through the heart, oxygen through breathing, the way cuts and bruises heal, etc. She knows what death is and hates the very idea. She knows a penis from a vulva, and how adults look different from kids.
And, being my child, she not only knows how babies are born, she is highly interested in the whole process. She saw my cervix when she was 3 years old (thank you, Beah). Also at barely three, when my periods came back after Kessa's birth, she asked all sorts of questions and learned about periods. ("What's that?" "Blood." "Do you have an owie?" "No, that just happens to grown-up mommies when there's no baby in their belly." "Why?" "Because babies need the blood to grow, but if there's no baby the mommy doesn't need the blood so it comes out." "But why isn't there a baby in your belly?" "uuuuuuhhhhhh." "I know why... because it already came out! It's Kessa!") She knows that babies start out tiny and grow bigger until they're real babies who are ready to come out. She knows they come out the vagina and the vagina stretches wide to let the baby through, and that it can hurt but that's OK because it does not harm the mommy. She knows that some babies come out at the hospital, some in a "midwife house" and some at home. She knows that some babies have to come out through a cut in the mommy's belly. She knows that sometimes mommies have two babies in their belly.
And she recently figured out a very important fact of life: that all of this is the domain of women. Men do not give birth.
"Mommy, why can't men have babies?"
"Because they don't have a uterus."
That satisfied her for a week. Then came:
"Mommy, men don't have uteruses, right? What do men have instead of a uterus?"
OK, where do babies come from I was prepared for. What do men have instead of a uterus... not so much. I can't remember exactly what I said, but I think it was something about we could look in a book together and see what's on the inside of a man's body. She hasn't brought it up again, so she still doesn't know what a man has instead of a uterus... and I have a feeling when it comes up again, I'll also be explaining how the baby gets in the mommy's uterus.
And, being my child, she not only knows how babies are born, she is highly interested in the whole process. She saw my cervix when she was 3 years old (thank you, Beah). Also at barely three, when my periods came back after Kessa's birth, she asked all sorts of questions and learned about periods. ("What's that?" "Blood." "Do you have an owie?" "No, that just happens to grown-up mommies when there's no baby in their belly." "Why?" "Because babies need the blood to grow, but if there's no baby the mommy doesn't need the blood so it comes out." "But why isn't there a baby in your belly?" "uuuuuuhhhhhh." "I know why... because it already came out! It's Kessa!") She knows that babies start out tiny and grow bigger until they're real babies who are ready to come out. She knows they come out the vagina and the vagina stretches wide to let the baby through, and that it can hurt but that's OK because it does not harm the mommy. She knows that some babies come out at the hospital, some in a "midwife house" and some at home. She knows that some babies have to come out through a cut in the mommy's belly. She knows that sometimes mommies have two babies in their belly.
And she recently figured out a very important fact of life: that all of this is the domain of women. Men do not give birth.
"Mommy, why can't men have babies?"
"Because they don't have a uterus."
That satisfied her for a week. Then came:
"Mommy, men don't have uteruses, right? What do men have instead of a uterus?"
OK, where do babies come from I was prepared for. What do men have instead of a uterus... not so much. I can't remember exactly what I said, but I think it was something about we could look in a book together and see what's on the inside of a man's body. She hasn't brought it up again, so she still doesn't know what a man has instead of a uterus... and I have a feeling when it comes up again, I'll also be explaining how the baby gets in the mommy's uterus.
Passover
I must say, Elly rocked the seders. She may have a well-deserved reputation as a bit of a banshee, but come Saturday night's seder which lasted 3 hours and didn't even start until her bedtime, she rocked. She sat properly at the table. She listened, or played quietly with the plague frogs or her seder coloring book, or talked to me in a quiet voice. She sang "Ma Nishtanah" all by herself in front of not only relatives but also complete strangers. She let one of said complete strangers make her the assistant in all his Passover-appropriate magic tricks. She was very patient with her younger cousin, who required, well, quite a bit of patience.
Now, this is not to say that she was perfect. I did have to remind her of the rules from time to time. That said, she actually obeyed these reminders without fuss.
Dare I hope we are entering a new era, in which Eliana is slightly more cooperative? I didn't think so... but have gotten much encouragement from other moms of spirited daughters who say it gets much easier as they get older. I gave up on the maturing out of it idea long ago. Perhaps I was wrong to... but I'm waiting for proof as time passes.
The second night, I brought both kids. The second night seder consisted of my in-laws, my mom, Scott, me, and the kids. Both kids did great. Kes sang Ma Nishtanah, very bashfully, even hiding her face in my lap for part of it. Very cute. At the end of the night, someone gave Elly a compliment on her behavior, and she said, "I know! I'm very happy about myself."
Now, this is not to say that she was perfect. I did have to remind her of the rules from time to time. That said, she actually obeyed these reminders without fuss.
Dare I hope we are entering a new era, in which Eliana is slightly more cooperative? I didn't think so... but have gotten much encouragement from other moms of spirited daughters who say it gets much easier as they get older. I gave up on the maturing out of it idea long ago. Perhaps I was wrong to... but I'm waiting for proof as time passes.
The second night, I brought both kids. The second night seder consisted of my in-laws, my mom, Scott, me, and the kids. Both kids did great. Kes sang Ma Nishtanah, very bashfully, even hiding her face in my lap for part of it. Very cute. At the end of the night, someone gave Elly a compliment on her behavior, and she said, "I know! I'm very happy about myself."
Sunday, April 13, 2008
The Series Finale
I suppose 14 weeks pregnant is a good time to introduce #3 to the blog.
This baby has kicked my butt so far. Such a hard pregnancy. I felt drunk and hung over at the same time for a few months, in addition to the regular feel of pregnancy nausea and fatigue (note lack of posts for said time period). I was barely functional. Now I am feeling better but it is still harder than my girls. Add to that some other new symptoms and I am pretty sure this is a boy.
Last night I had a dream that the baby was born. It was a boy and he didn't look a thing like either one of the names Scott and I are discussing. We got out the baby name book and couldn't come up with anything. Funny. He was a big'un... I guess my subconscious remembers what my babies look like, even after having attended all these births with regular and smallish babies since Kes was born. (9 of the 11 babies have been between 6-8 and 7-11)
I did have a girl dream a while back, but I blame that on a friend that said I was jinxing myself into a girl by thinking it was a boy... I had the dream that night, and in the dream it wasn't my baby. This was at 12 weeks, but in the dream I was 14 weeks and I woke up and I was bleeding and I said, oh no the baby. Scott, my mom, and my midwives (who of course, being in a dream, were not actually *my* midwives) all said, no, you gave birth, here she is... and presented me with a robust full-term baby girl. I said "but I'm 14 weeks" and they said, "well, your dates must've been off, because she's 8 pounds" and I didn't say anything but I decided I'd had a miscarriage and they'd presented me with someone else's baby to keep me from being sad, because my belly hadn't been big enough to house an 8 lb baby (not even a 2 lb baby).
The girls are thrilled. Elly can't wait and says she wants to be at the birth - not just the moment of birth but "the whole. I don't want to miss anything." (She IS my child, despite most of the evidence.) It is very abstract to Kes, but she will tell you that there's a baby in my belly, that it will come out, and that she'll be a big sister - it's just that there is no concept to her whether it's going to come out tomorrow or when she's 10.
Scott is really calm and has embraced this pregnancy and supported me with grace. (Male grace.) He is fully on board with the homebirth, which I appreciate so much.
I feel little baby movements, time and again. I love it. I'm looking forward to having them be stronger and more frequent. Feeling baby is my favorite part of pregnancy.
This baby has kicked my butt so far. Such a hard pregnancy. I felt drunk and hung over at the same time for a few months, in addition to the regular feel of pregnancy nausea and fatigue (note lack of posts for said time period). I was barely functional. Now I am feeling better but it is still harder than my girls. Add to that some other new symptoms and I am pretty sure this is a boy.
Last night I had a dream that the baby was born. It was a boy and he didn't look a thing like either one of the names Scott and I are discussing. We got out the baby name book and couldn't come up with anything. Funny. He was a big'un... I guess my subconscious remembers what my babies look like, even after having attended all these births with regular and smallish babies since Kes was born. (9 of the 11 babies have been between 6-8 and 7-11)
I did have a girl dream a while back, but I blame that on a friend that said I was jinxing myself into a girl by thinking it was a boy... I had the dream that night, and in the dream it wasn't my baby. This was at 12 weeks, but in the dream I was 14 weeks and I woke up and I was bleeding and I said, oh no the baby. Scott, my mom, and my midwives (who of course, being in a dream, were not actually *my* midwives) all said, no, you gave birth, here she is... and presented me with a robust full-term baby girl. I said "but I'm 14 weeks" and they said, "well, your dates must've been off, because she's 8 pounds" and I didn't say anything but I decided I'd had a miscarriage and they'd presented me with someone else's baby to keep me from being sad, because my belly hadn't been big enough to house an 8 lb baby (not even a 2 lb baby).
The girls are thrilled. Elly can't wait and says she wants to be at the birth - not just the moment of birth but "the whole. I don't want to miss anything." (She IS my child, despite most of the evidence.) It is very abstract to Kes, but she will tell you that there's a baby in my belly, that it will come out, and that she'll be a big sister - it's just that there is no concept to her whether it's going to come out tomorrow or when she's 10.
Scott is really calm and has embraced this pregnancy and supported me with grace. (Male grace.) He is fully on board with the homebirth, which I appreciate so much.
I feel little baby movements, time and again. I love it. I'm looking forward to having them be stronger and more frequent. Feeling baby is my favorite part of pregnancy.
Recent quotes
Kes: "Hi, what's your name?"
"I'm kitty, what's your name?"
"I'm dinosaur. Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you too!"
"Wanna play?"
"Yeah!"
"doo doo doo doo doo doo doo."
Elly: "Mommy, I love you 29 and I love Daddy 30, because I love him more than you."
Scott: (laughs)
Me: "Oh? Why?"
Elly: "Because he doesn't yell as much."
Scott: (looks confused)
Me: "You're not home as much as I am."
Scott: "Exactly."
Kes: "Mommy, is that your vulva?"
Me: "Yes, honey."
Kes: "But Daddy has a round and round, and a straight line down, and that's his kinda like a vulva."
(This was even funnier in person as she demonstrated with her index finger.)
Elly: (catches my blown kisses) "But Mommy, tomorrow your kisses will be gone."
Me: "That's OK, they'll rub off your cheeks on to your pillow and then your pillow will be full of Mommy love."
Elly: "No, they're going to go down into my belly, and then they'll go into my testines, and then they'll come out as poo. Will the poo be pink with your kisses in it?"
Me: "No honey."
Elly: "Oh. Poo is always brown, right?"
Sigh... I liked my explanation better.
Me: "I love you Kesenia Lily."
Kes: "I love you Megan."
"I'm kitty, what's your name?"
"I'm dinosaur. Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you too!"
"Wanna play?"
"Yeah!"
"doo doo doo doo doo doo doo."
Elly: "Mommy, I love you 29 and I love Daddy 30, because I love him more than you."
Scott: (laughs)
Me: "Oh? Why?"
Elly: "Because he doesn't yell as much."
Scott: (looks confused)
Me: "You're not home as much as I am."
Scott: "Exactly."
Kes: "Mommy, is that your vulva?"
Me: "Yes, honey."
Kes: "But Daddy has a round and round, and a straight line down, and that's his kinda like a vulva."
(This was even funnier in person as she demonstrated with her index finger.)
Elly: (catches my blown kisses) "But Mommy, tomorrow your kisses will be gone."
Me: "That's OK, they'll rub off your cheeks on to your pillow and then your pillow will be full of Mommy love."
Elly: "No, they're going to go down into my belly, and then they'll go into my testines, and then they'll come out as poo. Will the poo be pink with your kisses in it?"
Me: "No honey."
Elly: "Oh. Poo is always brown, right?"
Sigh... I liked my explanation better.
Me: "I love you Kesenia Lily."
Kes: "I love you Megan."
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Gorgeous
In a public bathroom with a stainless steel toilet bowl:
Kes: "Mommy, that's the most gordzous toilet I've never seen!"
My favorite word of Kessa's right now is "clricky." As in "Mommy, watch this! It's a very clricky thing for me to do. I did it! Whew, that was clricky."
Kes: "Mommy, that's the most gordzous toilet I've never seen!"
My favorite word of Kessa's right now is "clricky." As in "Mommy, watch this! It's a very clricky thing for me to do. I did it! Whew, that was clricky."
Elly's academia
I do nothing, I swear. I am not didactic with this kid at all. We talk about stuff, but mostly because she asks me. But I never sit down and teach her. So what happens? She's still way too smart.
Me: "You have 14 toes."
Elly: "No!"
Me: "You have 8 toes."
Elly: "No! I have 10 toes. And 10 plus 10 is 20."
Me: "Wow, that's right!" (Thought to self, cool, she remembers counting all her fingers and toes a couple weeks ago... and she translated that into a math problem... cool. Then she blew me away:)
Elly: "And 11 plus 9 is 20."
Floored.
Today she read "Vitamin A & D milk" off the carton. She constantly is reading restaurant and store signs as we drive across town (it reminds me of my Grandma Anne who used to do this whenever we went anywhere). Tonight she read a 100 word 1st grade level book with only three prompts: Castle ("yes, that's what it should say, but it doesn't play fair, what do you think it says?") brought ("that doesn't play fair, the o-u-g-h is just saying o's sound") and general ("g usually says 'g' but an e usually makes a g say j's sound").
Me: "You have 14 toes."
Elly: "No!"
Me: "You have 8 toes."
Elly: "No! I have 10 toes. And 10 plus 10 is 20."
Me: "Wow, that's right!" (Thought to self, cool, she remembers counting all her fingers and toes a couple weeks ago... and she translated that into a math problem... cool. Then she blew me away:)
Elly: "And 11 plus 9 is 20."
Floored.
Today she read "Vitamin A & D milk" off the carton. She constantly is reading restaurant and store signs as we drive across town (it reminds me of my Grandma Anne who used to do this whenever we went anywhere). Tonight she read a 100 word 1st grade level book with only three prompts: Castle ("yes, that's what it should say, but it doesn't play fair, what do you think it says?") brought ("that doesn't play fair, the o-u-g-h is just saying o's sound") and general ("g usually says 'g' but an e usually makes a g say j's sound").
Good nights
I have been meaning to write down the current nighttime song rituals. I am sure they will change as they always have, and I can never remember what they used to be, once they're gone. So here's current. This is for Kes, who goes to sleep first. Then I leave and Eliana reads to me. I read to her, we have our "talk time", and she has a snack. Then I put her to bed and sing her one song of her choosing.
I Will (the Beatles)
Lullaby (Brahms and my mama)
Hinei Ma Tov (traditional Jewish, re-melodied by Rick Recht)
Shir Chadash (Psalm 96, melody by Julie Silver)
I Will
Who knows how long I've loved you
Although I always will
Will I wait a lonely lifetime
If you want me to, I will
Love you forever and forever
Love you with all my heart
Love you whenever we're together
Love you when we're apart
And when at last I find you
Your song will fill the air
Sing it loud so I can hear you
Make it easy to be hear you
For the things you do endear you to me
Oh you know I will
I will
Lullaby
Lullaby and goodnight
Go to sleep sweet Kesenia
Mommy loves you, Daddy too
Go to sleep and close your eyes
Day is gone, night has come
and the whole world is sleeping
Day is gone, night has come,
rest your head and go to sleep.
Hinei Ma Tov
Hinei ma tov uma na'im
Shevet achim gam yachad (repeated)
(which means, roughly, "how wonderful to be together")
Shir Chadash
Shiru l'Adonai kol ha-aretz
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Sing unto God all the earth a new song
I will sing unto God a new song
Sing unto God and we'll all sing along
Unto God all the earth a new song
Shiru l'Adonai kol ha-aretz
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Usually the one song Elly chooses is Hinei or I Will (aka "The Love You Song"), but occasionally she wants The Man in the Moon:
The Man in the Moon, as he sails the sky
is a most remarkable skipper
But he made a mistake when he tried to take
a drink of milk from the dipper
He dipped it in the Milky Way
and slowly and carefully filled it
The big bear growled and the little bear howled
and frightened him so that he spilled it.
I Will (the Beatles)
Lullaby (Brahms and my mama)
Hinei Ma Tov (traditional Jewish, re-melodied by Rick Recht)
Shir Chadash (Psalm 96, melody by Julie Silver)
I Will
Who knows how long I've loved you
Although I always will
Will I wait a lonely lifetime
If you want me to, I will
Love you forever and forever
Love you with all my heart
Love you whenever we're together
Love you when we're apart
And when at last I find you
Your song will fill the air
Sing it loud so I can hear you
Make it easy to be hear you
For the things you do endear you to me
Oh you know I will
I will
Lullaby
Lullaby and goodnight
Go to sleep sweet Kesenia
Mommy loves you, Daddy too
Go to sleep and close your eyes
Day is gone, night has come
and the whole world is sleeping
Day is gone, night has come,
rest your head and go to sleep.
Hinei Ma Tov
Hinei ma tov uma na'im
Shevet achim gam yachad (repeated)
(which means, roughly, "how wonderful to be together")
Shir Chadash
Shiru l'Adonai kol ha-aretz
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Sing unto God all the earth a new song
I will sing unto God a new song
Sing unto God and we'll all sing along
Unto God all the earth a new song
Shiru l'Adonai kol ha-aretz
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Shiru l'Adonai shir chadash
Usually the one song Elly chooses is Hinei or I Will (aka "The Love You Song"), but occasionally she wants The Man in the Moon:
The Man in the Moon, as he sails the sky
is a most remarkable skipper
But he made a mistake when he tried to take
a drink of milk from the dipper
He dipped it in the Milky Way
and slowly and carefully filled it
The big bear growled and the little bear howled
and frightened him so that he spilled it.
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